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By Chris Helvajian

At this point in the admissions cycle many of you are having important conversations with students about financial aid, deciding what school is the best fit for them, and answering questions about academics. This TGHS post will highlight some of the best head-scratching conversations I’ve gathered from tours.

Follow The…
Visitor: “Can you tell me which way the dorms are from here?”
Guide: “Sure! See all of the large green arrows on the ground? Just follow them all the way to the dorms.”
Visitor: “… Okay…. but I’m color blind…”
Guide: “OK… well then… just follow the arrows on the ground.”

When?
Visitor: “When is the 2 p.m. tour?
Guide: “… 2 p.m.”
Visitor: “Got it, OK. That’s too late for us. When is the 10 a.m. tour?”
Guide: “…10 a.m.”
Visitor: “Thanks. We’ll sign up for that one then!”

Buffet
 Guide: “The nice part about eating on campus in the cafeteria is that it’s all-you-can-eat!”
Visitor: “What’s the least amount you can eat?”
Guide: “…Nothing.”

Parking
Guide: “Did you get a parking pass?”
Visitor: “No, we didn’t. Do you have one?”
Guide: “Sure! Just put this inside your car on the dash.”
Visitor: “But my car is locked.”

Mascot
Visitor: “What’s your mascot?”
Guide: “Great question! It’s a bobcat. You’ll see a statue of it later.”
Visitor: “No what’s YOUR mascot?”
Guide: “… um, also a bobcat?”
Visitor: “That’s right.”

Attend
Visitor: “If my son were to go to your school, what’s to stop him from leaving?”
Guide: “Well, we have a really high retention rate. Not many students leave.”
Visitor: “No, will there be someone physically there to keep him from leaving?”
Guide: “Like someone to restrain him?”
Visitor: “Yes.”
Guide: “No…”